This past Wednesday rain was in the forecast, but the sun unexpectedly made a prolonged appearance as I was making my way to a beautiful stream in northern Harford County where my office has proposed a conservation project. I was driving a work truck whose manufacturer assumed taller people would be operating the pedals, so even though I pulled the seat as far forward as I could, it was still an uncomfortable reach. Despite the less than ideal driving conditions, it was difficult to be sour with spring air rushing through the open truck windows and the cacophony of song birds lining the otherwise quiet country roads.
It was my good fortune to be in the truck at that time of day for another reason; at that exact time Diane Rehm happened to be interviewing Maya Angelou on NPR. I have always loved the richness of Maya Angelou's voice, the tone and depth as unique as any finger print, and I would have been content simply listening to her recite the alphabet. She had much more to say than a string of letters though, and her distinctive voice is of course a vehicle to impart her equally unique wisdom.
Definition: Forgive: to stop feeling angry or resentful towards someone for an offense, flaw or mistake
Forgiveness is interesting because it is much easier to speak than it is to actually integrate. It is easy to say 'I forgive you', and much more difficult to feel the lightness of true forgiveness when you no longer have to shoulder the burden of anger, resentment, or hurt. Forgiveness is a life skill that takes time to master, and it's not something someone else can do for us, we have to put in the hard work ourselves.
Maya Angelou's life has given her ample opportunities to practice forgiveness. What is so incredible about her is how she was able to transform tragic events into the strength, grace, and beauty she shares with the world when it would have been perhaps just as easy (if not easier) to allow those events to become a source of bitterness and hatred. If there was ever an authority on forgiveness, it would be her. So when a caller asked her how she was able to forgive, I turned the radio up.
She responded by saying she likes to turn forgiveness around and make it two words - 'give for'; whenever someone does something to hurt her she will turn around and buy some onions, carrots, celery (for example) and make a roast. She then gives the roast to someone who is hungry. She is giving the roast for whomever may have hurt her, and then she is able to let the hurt go; she doesn't have to carry around the resentment towards that person anymore. I was struck by the simplicity of her response, and I thought, that is Yoga. She never spoke one work of Sanskrit, and as far as I could tell she wasn't holding Vrkasana during the interview, but her words on forgiveness were pure Yoga.
Definition: Yoga : sanskrit root Yuj = to link together; to link together the everyday self with the universal self
What is more everyday than going to the grocery store (or outside to garden) to get vegetables and then slicing and cooking them for a meal? It is simple, quantifiable, real. And yet in this case that simple action is linked to a unique intention. Our universal self observes our connection to the web of creation. In other words, our universal self can take a step back and put on a wider lens. When someone hurts us, our pain is immediate, but if we can step outside our pain we can see that how we react will either prolong our collective suffering or alleviate it. This is philosophy. All talk. Maya has put it into action. The intention of the universal self to alleviate suffering is linked with the everyday self when the simple action of cooking a meal alleviates the suffering of someone who doesn't have the means to cook for themselves. When we respond to pain with compassion, our own suffering is lessened as well (Yogic philosophy would say it is because we are all connected).
The interview concluded with Diane and Maya sharing heart-felt words of praise and respect for one another, and my own heart felt lighter to witness their kindness. As I stepped out of the truck and shook out my over-stretched right driving leg before putting on my rubber boots below the cheerful trills of countless song birds, I silently wondered what the world would be like if we all made an effort to be that kind to one another. What if we took the more difficult (and more rewarding) path of forgiveness instead of harboring hatred and resentment? Let's get our hands dirty and give it a try.